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Wanna give your two cents? » Rowena’s Blog

Wanna give your two cents?

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Right now, my sister’s wedding is tentatively fixed for June and she’s all pins and needles about what to do. More than anything, it’s the dresses and décor that she’s hyper about. What’s the bridal trousseau gonna wear? How to arrange them? Do I really need flower girls? What about my dress? Should I wear a tiara or crown? Have you come across any nice ideas? And the list goes on. Now all these are a priority, but coming a close second is her ability to cook. So she turns to me (yeah right!).

In the months leading to my wedding day, loads of people tried to shove down their tit-bits of “married wisdom”. You just can’t help it, they’re dying to tell you what works and what doesn’t. Even if you don’t need it, you just have to listen cos after all, they’ve been married for years!!

Coming to think of it, I didn’t take anyone’s advice seriously. Some told me that the woman should have the upper hand, some told me only the man. Few said I should be in control of our home finances and expenses whereas someone had the cheek to ask me what I knew about accounts since that wasn’t my branch of study! As a wife, I should be doting whereas as a woman, I shouldn’t, ahem, for lack of a better phrase, allow my husband to grind chutney on my head (it means, don’t be gullible and allow him to rule over you). It’s funny how conversations like this start. You’ll have some idea though when they pull you aside and talk in a low tone as if you’re the sole guardian of this huge secret.

“Listen Rowena, now that you’re getting married, I don’t know when I’ll have the chance to tell you this (how about never?). But make sure you blah blah blah blah”

“So are you excited your D-day is drawing near? Any butterflies in the stomach? (only for what you’re gonna tell me now) I remember in my time, we didn’t have much to prepare and there was no one to advise me (sweet times) but you’re lucky. Blah blah blah blah”

“I’ve been married for more than 25 years. At your age I had full grown children (now’s the part I’m supposed to feel old) and had to take care of them by myself (hey, uncle was there!). Marriage is a whole new ball game blah blah blah”

A dear friend of mine told me to take all the advice I got, throw it overboard and listen only to Jesus, the best adviser.The throwing I did immediately, it’s the listening that I’m trying to do.

My sis is already getting fed up of the advice she’s getting and her disgusted look gives the message loud and clear to anyone who’s trying to be “helpful”. Told her to take it with a pinch of salt and one day laugh over it. Same reason why I’ve ticked “fun times” as a category for this post :)

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2 Comments on "Wanna give your two cents?"

  1. Clement
    23/01/2009 at 6:08 am Permalink

    Super post! I liked that last bit, I try too.

    Btw this is not advice but just thought I will share with you something that has made our two years good (2nd anniversary yesterday). We made a pact (D and I) that every time we fight (that is quite often) we never fail to make up no matter what it takes before we sleep that night. It works!!!

  2. rowena
    26/01/2009 at 10:47 am Permalink

    Hey congrats on the 2 years! got any advice on ur anniversary ;) ?

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